19 . 06 . 17

This week has been another week of just full on working! I’ve been taking on so much overtime, that I haven’t even had time to read! Can you imagine that?! I really hope it’s worth it when I receive my first pay check, because that’s the only thing that’s keeping me going right now.

My shifts are 6-12, so every time I come home, 9 times out of 10 I just completely crash. I fall asleep on the sofa when really I want to be getting up and doing things. I want to be catching up on my tv shows and starting new ones. I want to be reading my books and reviewing them. I’m so glad that I’ve got myself a job, and starting to feel more like an adult. But I don’t want that to mean that I lose touch with all of the stuff that I enjoy doing! It’s a matter of balancing my life out and being more active, I just hope that I can get a handle on it soon.

Then again, I am slightly aware that it is also due to anxiety’s voice in the back of my mind. The voice that makes me feel guilty for having a nap even when I’m absolutely shattered, because I should have been doing countless other things. It’s as if it’s trying to make me feel less fulfilled about my life because I’m not doing enough with my days.

Despite this view, I have done a lot of things looking back at the week. I went out for a friends birthday and watched Wonder Woman (incredible!) and then watched Baywatch the next day. I also took myself out for a walk when I was feeling a little suffocated by the house, and treated myself to an ice cream, due to the fact that it was a supremely hot day. This week I have had a hell of a lot more social interactions than normal, and it has felt great. It really does make you feel more refreshed and builds my confidence up. I’d like to think that this week coming up, I’ll be able to be more active after work too.

In reflection this week had had its ups and downs, but it started off really strong and work has been so great lately!


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